Thursday, June 9, 2011

Summer: Then and Now

Last Summer and the summer before that and the summer before that were some of the hardest summers I have ever endured.

The summer of 2008 I had just given birth to a preemie baby girl after 3 months, 3 MONTHS, on strict hospital bed rest.

 Paul was smack dab in the middle of the TERRIFIC TWO's

And I was suffering from a horrible bought of postpartum depression.
Oh my gosh that was HORRIBLE

The summer of 2009 was spent TRYNG to survive the wrath of a 3 year old and a 1 year old.
Every evening I sat staring at the clock, just praying for the time to tick away so that I could put them to bed.  
I remember feeling like someone had beat me with a bat.
Day in and day out trying to keep up with a 3 year old and a 1 year old was taking its toll on me.
I vividly remember sitting in the living room floor, in tears, thinking "I can't do this. I just can't do this anymore. I am exhausted. I can't."

You have to keep in mind that we do not live close to family, at that time we weren't near anyone who could help me at a moments notice and I was home ALL DAY with no break.
And on top of that, we were moving towns.
We had just bought our very first home and I was stuck with the task of tending to two CRAZY kids AND packing.

I was completely and utterly ALONE.
Completely and utterly EXHAUSTED
It was a horrible state to be in as a young mother of two young children.

The summer of 2010 was a little bit better. 
a LITTLE bit better.
At that time Roger was working as an associate minister of a church.
Paul was 4 and Anna was 2.

Anna was a HANDFUL (still is) but Paul was very chill (still is).
We had a few people (3 families) in the church that acknowledged my presence.
The rest of the church COMPLETELY ignored me.

No seriously, for real.

I would be at the playground or out at the store and they would try their best to avoid me.

It was the worst on the playground. .

It was like they didn't want their children playing with the minister's children.
And heaven for bid I say Hi to them. They would look insulted that I even acknowledge their presence. It was like I was the hired help and had NO RIGHT to talk to them.

Any way........ moving on

This summer, the summer of 2011, has been FABULOUS so far.

We are living in this incredible home with a MASSIVE back yard.

It so much more enjoyable to take care of the kids when you have such a nice backyard.

We have a membership to the Swim and Fitness place with a MASSIVE but not too crowded pool and a glorious amount of treadmills.

We are surrounded by the kindest people I have EVER met.
Like seriously, I never knew people could care so much for one another.

The kids are MUCH more manageable.
Anna is 3 and Paul is 5.
Going places is almost a piece of cake.... they BOTH can put their OWN shoes on.
Carry their OWN stuff.
And climb in and out of the car in record speed.


No more diapers.
No more bottles
No more strict nap times
(even though most days they nap from 1 to 3, I don't WORRY about it if we are having too much fun and miss a nap because we are at the pool or at the zoo)
No more lugging car seats
No more diaper bags
No more CHASING a toddler.

It's not ALL bliss but it is pretty close.
I can, get this, sit in the yard, soaking up the sun, reading a book, while the kids play.
 I thought THIS day would NEVER come.
I'm sitting!
I'm reading!
I'm having fun!
The kids are having fun!

The world all of a sudden seems like a GLORIOUS place.
My job as Stay at Home Mother seems like HEAVEN.

Except on days when every one, including me, is cranky from lack of sleep.

So, all of those words to say that I am having a WONDERFUL summer with my two little buddies.
I almost feel guilty for having so much fun. 

I'm enjoying every single second of NOT being on any sort of strict schedule.
Kindergarten starts the first week of August and THAT, my friend, is when the strict schedule for life starts.

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