Friday, November 19, 2010

A non nagging marriage


This morning started off just like every morning in this crazy lovable family. Roger and I were woken up to a "DING DONG" of the door bell at 7:40am. Our alarm hadn't gone off so I rushed to the front door in my night mask, pjs and no bra while Roger hopped around the room putting pants on. We were told that a guy was coming to fix our window around 8am but Roger had set our alarm for 6pm instead of AM. I know, we have all been there. Snuggled in our beds only to realize that WE ARE LATE.

"Umm mommy are you going to take me to school?" was the next thing that I heard. As I stood in the living room half awake I yelled out "well, crap. today was suppose to be Paul's first day to see his new school," as I took off in a mad dash to the bathroom. Roger just gave the "go ahead. don't worry. I'll fix the kids breakfast" head nod.

We managed to snap a "going to a new school for the first time" picture. Paul is holding his preschool application. He looks super excited here but he was rather sappy on the way to school "but mom. Best friends are suppose to hang out together and have fun. You're my best friend mom. I love you. Why are you taking me to school? i'll miss you forever."  My response "I know it is scary Paul. I am terrified about you going to school. however, it is just for 2 1/2 hrs a day and I just know that you'll love it!"

 He did LOVE IT even though he refused to go in the room. I stood in the door while he peaked around the corner "checking things out."  His little eyes lit up when they started working on math "hey mom. I know that stuff. ya see mom, 5 minus 2 is 3!!!! I know this stuff!"  He waved at several of the kids in a "hey! I'm super paul" kinda way. He was AMAZED that his new school had its own library, gym AND computer lab.  "WOW mom. Now that is pretty cool!"

When we got home Paul and I took our very first bike ride around the neighborhood! He rode his big boy training wheel bike and I rode my trek. It was wonderful to be able to giggle with him all afternoon! 

Now, beware, Roger just might be horribly mad at me for writing what I am about to write but I am willing to make the scarafice for all you lovey wives out there. Ok, here I go.

This afternoon, as I stood in the yard looking up at the roof I couldn't help but think "you know what, I am going to clean those gutters......right now."   So, I got me a chair to reach the gutters and started to clean them out with my bare hands. yuck? oh no, ya see, I LOVE to get my hands dirty. I love doing jobs that have that nice satisfaction of "I did that and it is done."

Well, my husband came out to check on his crazy wife only to find me trying to figure out how to climb up on the roof to sweep the leaves off.

 "oh no. you don't need to do that. Here let me do that" -Roger
I helped him get on the roof and handed him a broom


 He even ended up finishing the gutter cleaning project that I started!
 I grabbed the rake to start cleaning up the leaves on the ground and he said "oh no. you don't need to do that. here let me do that."
At  first I was a bit offended "hey buddy just because I'm a chick doesn't mean I can't get my hands dirty or climb up on the roof." I was raised that if you want something done then do it yourself. but then it came to me "I don't have to nag my husband to do stuff. Instead, I just start doing it myself, he feels bad sitting back watching me and decides to do it himself!"   THIS IS AWESOME!  Roger does this stuff all the time. i start something and he finishes it. 

Maybe that's why we don't have that nagging relationship? I don't know. 

But I do know that I am no longer going to be offended when he steps in and takes over. I used to get so mad when he looked out the window, saw me mowing the grass and demanded in a loving way that I let him finish the yard work. "Listen buddy, I can push this lawn mower just as well as you can."

I totally need to take advantage of this new found knowledge. I'm glad it only took 6 1/2 years of marriage to figure this out!!!!  

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