Such is Life

I'm sitting upstairs in my quiet place.

I turned our little loft area into a in-home library, or as I lovingly refer to it, "my office."

This is the space that I retreat to when I need to center myself.

 Life gets crazy sometimes and I need to step away for a bit to reflect on the goodness, to remind myself that I am held by a gracious and humble God.The peace that I get from retreating gives me the strength that I need to take on the day.

Yesterday was our first official day back home from the holiday madness. This season we were gone a lot. On top of the normal Christmas festivities that take place with our family members we also added a trip to North Carolina to visit some of Roger's extended family.

We had only one day between getting back from Christmas festivities with our parents and packing up to go to North Carolina for a week, that we were home. In that one day we had to unpack, do laundry, and pack back up, on top of helping the kids explore (put together) their new toys and bagging up their old toys for donation.

After 13hours on the road to North Carolina, a week of visiting, and 13hours on the road back home, I am exhausted. But alas, there is laundry to do, groceries to buy, children to tend to, and class to get ready for.

This morning Anna woke up screaming at  4am. Roger has a conference in Georgetown today (2hrs away) where he is presenting a paper, along with some pretty well known theologians, so I tried my best to deal with the screaming and hysterical 5 1/2 year old by myself. Anna finally fell back asleep around 7am, at which point we had to wake her up for school. I don;t even want to think about how cranky she is going to be when she steps off that bus at 2pm.

On the way home from North Carolina I got caught in what they call a "speed trap." So there I was, minding my own business, when the dreaded blue and red lights started flashing. I pulled over to find out that the 55mph speed limit had gone down, for a brief second, to 25mph. Great!  Having had no previous tickets, and being from out of town, I figured I would get a pass. Nope. I was handed a speeding ticket for 182.00.  WHAT????? 

When we FINALLY arrived back to our home sweet home we settled in for the night only to wake up to a freezing cold house. In the middle of the night our furnace stopped working. GREAT!!!!

We sent to kids off to school and immediately called our go to furnace guy.

Since Roger is going to be out of town, leaving me with the station wagon, he decided to go ahead and get the thing looked at. The station wagon has been making some CRAZY sounds and is in desperate need of new tires.

So, while I dealt with the furnace guy Roger sat working on work at Big O Tires.

Since I was home, and wasn't able to go anywhere because our furnace was being reparied, I opted to tackle the massive mound of laundry that comes with being away from home for almost a month. But when I turned on the washer no water came out. Our furnace guy then informed me that the pipe leading to the washer was frozen solid. GREAT!!!!!!

After a day like we had I decided that for dinner we should have some southern comfort. No. Not whiskey. But close. Beans and Corn Bread!!!!!!!!!!!

At abour 5:30 the beans were done, having simmered all day, and I was preparing to put the corn bread in the oven when all of a sudden  . . . . . .  . our electricity went out.   GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!!

At that point I gave up. I called Roger to pick up some cooked corn bread on the way home, and snuggled with the kids on the couch to enjoy the last part of the day light by reading books to them. What better way to escape the stress of life than through a children's book!

In the end the electricity came back on, I cooked the corn bread and we devoured some yummy southern comfort food.  And get this,before heading to bed I gave the washer another try and a few drips of water started coming out. I let it run like that for a while and it ended up thawing out. We have clean underwear!!!!!!

After the day we had, Roger and I headed to bed early. I snuggled up in my wonderful electric throw feeling that all was well with the world. Our furnace was fixed, our 2nd car was fixed, our pipe was thawed, and we had clean underwear for tomorrow.

But then, at 4am, the screaming started.

 Another day.        Another challenge.       Such is life.

But at least I have my quiet place to go to!!   

A prayer that is prayed by the Missionaries of Charity at the start of everyday:

Dear Lord, the Great Healer, I kneel before you, since every perfect gift must come from you. I pray, give skill to my hands, clear vision to my mind, kindness and meekness to my heart. Give me singleness of purpose, strength to lift up a part of the burden of my suffering fellowmen, and a realization of the privilege that is mine. Take from my heart all guile and worldliness, that with the simple faith of a child, I may rely on you.  Amen

Merry Christmas

Now I know why my parents would send us kids to Mamaw and Papaw's house and then go back home to chill. A house without screaming children is pretty darn peaceful. 

Paul and Anna have been in a rare form this week. I am blaming all the sugar that they seem to be getting at school. Or maybe I should blame the excitement of Christmas. Or, well, lets be honest, when it is cold outside and it gets dark so early there is not enough inside play to burn off the amount of energy a 8yr old and a 5 year old have. I blame the weather and the sun.

Either way, they have been nuts. Just ask our friend Tyler. He stopped by last night after work and, I kid you not, as soon as he walked in the door Paul jumped on his back and Anna started attacking him from the front. And of course the dog joined in on the fun.  It was a mad house. A MAD HOUSE.

This morning after sending the kids off to school I curled up in the fetal position in the middle of the living room floor. It felt nice blocking out, for just a split second, all the stuff that needs to be done before the children start arriving back home at 2pm.

My 3rd semester as a full time Grad student has come to an end and I am beyond giddy. I managed to finish the semester strong, unlike last semester in which I cried myself to sleep nightly and daily threatened to quit. I guess you could say that I am getting the hang of feeling overwhelmed and pushing through? 

I don't know. . . maybe not. 

I did call Roger just about every Monday at lunch crying. The call usually consisted of me telling him how stupid I was and how hard it is to be me. I get VERY dramatic, can you tell?

Anyway, the semester is over, I am giddy, the children are crazy, and Roger, like most ministers around this time, is super busy. It makes for very interesting days.

And for the heck of it, because I like sharing pictures, here is a photo of Anna and Paul playing dress up.  The back story: we decided that Roger was working too late and needed to come home so the kids dressed up and I drove them over to the church. I let them loose in the building to go find their dad, scare him, and kidnap him. 

  So I guess this post is random and has no point . . .  MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

Let Everyone Be Himself

A church member pointed this children's poem out to me. It comes from the book Peace on Earth: A Christmas Collection which was put together by Mary Engelbreit. The poem is written by James Freeman Clarke. 

Let everyone be himself, not try to be someone else. God, who looked on the world He had made and said it was all good, made each of us to be just what our own gifts and faculties fit us to be. Be that and do that and so be contented. Reverence, also, each other's gifts; do not quarrel with me because I am not you, and I will do the same. God made your brother as well as yourself.

He made you, perhaps, to be bright; he made him slow; he made you practical; he made him speculative; he made one strong and another weak, one tough and another tender; but the same God made us all. Let us not torment each other because we are not all alike, but believe that God knew best what he was doing in making us so different. So will the best harmony come out of seeming discords, the best affection out of differences, the best life out of struggle, and the best work will be done when each does his own work, and lets everyone else do and be what God made for him.

Paul's Writing Assignment

Paul had an assignment in the 1st grade to write about his mom's hands. 

I guess it somehow got lost because his 2nd grade teacher sent home some papers that his 1st grade teacher had found.

As you might imagine, as I read his little writing my breath was taken away.  

What a sweet boy we have! 

I remember my mom's hands holding mine as we jumped off the diving board.

We walked on the bottom of the deep end.

It was like walking on the moon.

I remember my mom's hands on my shoulder. 

I looked at the body of my grandpa Levi.

He died.

Tears came down my cheek.

I remember my mom's hands buy me minecraft.

Which I wanted so bad.

She made me happy.

The simple day to day things, those are what mean the most to your children.

Those are the things that they hold dear.

May we never forget that.

  

The Body of Christ: His Church

When I most need it, I run away from it.

Monday I tried to run away. I feared it.

But in the end, I went.

I sat in the back, trying to be alone, but no matter how far back I went I was still amongst them.

It has a way of doing that.

That's why during times like this, I run.

But this time was different, I didn't run. This time I leaned into it.

As I walked down to recieve communion by intinction I felt an arm wrap around me. A fellow Christian reaching out, consoling me, acknowledging that it was okay, in this place, at this time, to grieve, to seek comfort in the community of believers. 

As I took the bread, dipped it into the cup, placed it within my mouth, I was filled. 

God was with me.

His body was surrounding me.

The tears that flowed were not of sadness, but of gratitude. Even at such a time as this I can find rest.




 

A Sunday Afternoon Ambulance Ride

Hello Everyone!

Because I don't want anyone to worry I will quickly update you on what is going on.

Monday I wasn't feeling well after my 1st class so I decided to skip out on the rest o the school day and head home early.

Tuesday I woke up peeing a little bit of blood, but by the end of the day I was peeing a LOT of bright red blood and was begged by my husband to do to urgent care.

At urgent care I was diagnosed with a Kidney Infection.

Being that I had no other symptoms besides the blood in my urine, they wanted to later check for kidney cancer.  Just a precaution.

Starting Thursday I begin to have mild discomfort in my upper abdomen.

By Sunday afternoon the mild discomfort began to turn into pain. The pain started in the middle of my chest and radiated up through my left side and left arm.

By 4:30pm I could take it no longer so I headed to Urgent Care.  I figured it was either a gallbladder attack, very bad indigestion, or a possible side effect of the medicine.

While at Urgent Care I was so uncomfortable with the chest pain that I started to break out in a sweat. When the doctor walked in the exam room I tried by best to explain my symptoms. At that point it was hurting so bad that I could no longer hold back the tears of stress.

Once the Doctor say my medical history they gave me an aspirin, hooked me up to a monitor and oxygen, and called the ambulance.

I refused the ambulance, saying that I would drive myself to the ER, but they were insistent that I did not drive.

So I had them call my husband to come pick me up.
Roger arrived with the kids in tow.  

The doctors were still insistent that I take the ambulance.  So, In the end I took the ambulance and felt like a total idiot. I just KNEW it had nothing to do with my heart but whenever people see my heart history, on top of me having chest pain, they freak out. 

Once in the ER I refused all medical tests involving my heart. As I signed the papers saying that I would not sue the hospital if I indeed died of a heart attack, I explained to the doctors and RNs that it WAS something in my stomach area.

Little Anna refused to get near me, while Paul stood in the corner praying. I could see that this whole ordeal was upsetting the kids so I asked Roger try to find someone to come get them.

Our good friend Carla, who has 2 children of her own, got our kids and our house key.  She fed them dinner, took our dog out to pee, grabbed all the stuff that the kids would need for school the next day, and took them to her house.  Such a BIG help!

After a million tests the verdict was . . . "We don't know why you are hurting, but here is a prescription for some antacids."

Damn it.

That was the WHOLE reason I went to urgent care.  I knew I probably had something simple like that.  Since I was already in the ER I requested an ultra sound on my aorta, kidneys and gallbladder. That seems to be all ruled out so I am feeling mentally MUCH better.

Well, minus the bill from the ambulance and the ER.

Laughter.

 A few days ago Roger and I had our first real fight in a while. I honestly have no clue what it was even about. I do however remember the tension that was in the car as we drove the kids to school.

Oh wait, now I know what the fight was about!  

It was about something incredibly stupid. 

You'll laugh when I tell you.

Roger, who was driving at the time, was taking a different route than I usually take and was trying to tell me that it is quicker. I was telling him that he was a "Mr Know it all" and to stop, "my route is faster."  That spiraled into one of those crazy random marital spats that inevitably bring up past mistakes and end with that odd tension in the air.

Once the kids were dropped off we headed to the fitness center. Roger, having put the car in park, placed my water bottle on the seat next to me. Being that it didn't have a lid on it and that I had no clue he was putting it there, the water bottle tipped over, spilling water all over my butt.  

So, there I was, mad and getting ready to walk into the fitness center with a VERY wet butt.  As I was walking in, sulking, I noticed that I had at least half of the water bottle left. What did I do with it? Well, I ran up to Roger and poured it all down the front of his shirt.  

Yep.

I did.

What did Roger do?

He gave a little chuckle and said "ok. that's fair."

Right then and there we realized how insane our little marital spat was.  We apologized, giggled some more, and headed on into the fitness center.

Of course, when we got inside the people at the front desk asked why we were both so wet.

"he spelt water on me so I poured water on him."

***blank stare from behind the counter***

Why am I telling you this personal story?  

I have no clue.  

Maybe it is because I want to share the importance of being able to laugh at yourself.  Laughter is what gets me through so much. SO MUCH. 

Don't take life too serious. 

Laugh.  

Sometimes I forget that.

 Fortunately I am married to a man that NEVER forgets that. 

Yes, sometimes it is annoying, but in the end it is good.  

  I am pretty sure the key to a healthy marriage is laughter.

Yep. I am almost positive.

I know Roger and I have only been married 9 years, but all the people I know that have been happily married for a REALLY long time laugh a LOT.  

 

There MUST be something to it.

Go forth and laugh! 

Take a look at this video. I think you will really like it.